1 Corinthians 7:16

For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife? (KJV)

Then: Christ first. Not my will but his. That's the goal no matter the action of the believer. It could be his or her influence will convict an unbelieving spouse whether it be through the daily life of marriage or the amenable actions of a peaceful separation. Thiselton (p. 537-538) presents the commentators discussion of a "pessimistic" translation. In it, the text actually refers to going ahead to divorce solely because the believer has no real basis to hope that his/her actions within the marriage will ever bring the unbeliever to salvation.

Now: For a long time murderers and thieves had a better chance of being forgiven and accepted into the life of the church than someone who had been divorced. The first group had many biblical cohorts - Jacob, Moses, and Paul himself were notorious for their actions and admirable as reformed people. They were leaders. But divorced people are shunted aside and not welcome to do anything but sit in the back pew. Sometimes exceptions were made, at least when the innocence of a particular individul was well known. As society is filled with more and more divorces, however, attitudes are changing. More forgiveness is proffered and greater space is found for them to serve within church ministries.

Extra source: The First Epistle to the Corinthians: a commentary on the Greek text by Anthony C. Thiselton (Authentic Media, c2000) online at http://books.google.com/books?id=IHG_DNLpmroC&dq=1st+Corinthian+commentaries&printsec=frontcover&source=in&hl=en&ei=W9fQSpC1GILplAfHiumoCg&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=11&ved=0CB8Q6AEwCg#v=onepage&q=&f=false

1 Corinthians 7:15

But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace (KJV)

Then: Christ's teachings on divorce take priority for Paul. Believers should stay married because they have made a sacred commitment. Yet for the sake of living in peace, that is actually displaying Christ's love, Paul advises the Corinthians to let non-believers leave the marriage. Possibly, loving your neighbor as yourself is the overriding principle. Daily contentions mar and block evidences of love. Peace reveals it. Therefore, Paul told the Corinthian brothers and/or sisters in Christ that they didn't need to stay bound to their vows. In a balance of two evils - divorce or daily contentions - Paul puts peace first. Knowing that no man is perfect, Paul still must have hated the need to deal with such problems. Yet loving all, as did Christ, he sorted through the morass to livable answers.

An additional principle may have been Christ's deference to the free will of each man. Since Christ never forces subjection, neither should a marriage. The Lord's delight is the individual who recognizes him as the truth, the way, and the life. In marriage, the unbelieving spouse cannot be required to violate his or her free will to associate with believers.

Now: It is difficult to know how Paul's advice and approach apply after a divorce. When Christ teaches that dissolution is allowed (Matthew 19:9) because of one partner's infidelity, remarriage is not precluded. But Paul has two contrary precepts: "Stay as you are when called," and "Do not risk your salvation." The first would result in never remarrying. The second implies remarriage in order to stay pure before Christ. Nit-picking through these two rulings can blind people to the true answer of seeking the highest calling of living for Christ.

Prayer, knowledge of self, and openness to God's directions can reveal resolutions which differ from person to person. Another layer of difficulty is the after-action and understandings of what to do when both members of the divorced couple were already followers. Paul did not allow them to divorce. Judging the divorced spouses' depth of commitment to Christ is not useful. Recognition that all men are imperfectly able to follow is a given. Remembering Christ's ever-available forgiveness helps. In spite of the fallen state of mankind - both personal and universal - fellow believers repent and continue teaching the Lord's calling to salvation.

1 Corinthians 7:14

For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy (KJV)

Then: Everybody has a different opinion of Paul's reasoning for this verse, early church fathers onward. Separating one thought from another is like looking down into a top-loading washing machine as the clothes swish from one spot to another in the water. Nothing stays put. The issue is "How can lack of faith be holy?" The only given is the center pole - the presence of the believer makes the unbelieving husband and children holy. As God provides grace to the believer, anyone living nearby also benefits from that grace and goodness. Although readers can observe that this verse contradicts Paul's previous requirement that a believer flee all immoral liasons (Corinthian infidelities), the believer's place before the Lord makes the difference. Sex within marriage is lawfully designed by God while sex outside of marriage is not. The second is condemned, that is, not capable of ever being holy before him. Citing Collins, Baker (p.104) brings in Paul's knowledge of Jewish heritage, whereby proselytes and their children were fully accepted as holy in the community. That's one comparison.

Now: Personally, I believe sanctity comes from God's mercy. When Lot lived in Sodom and Gomorrah, the Lord promised Abraham that if more than ten righteous people could be found, he would save the cities. When that proved impossible, the Lord sent Lot and his family away and the land was destroyed. In the same vein, Jesus taught that a little yeast will leaven the whole, salt maintaining its saltness has value, and light can overcome the darkness. In a marriage, the righteous believing spouse who receives God's mercy and favor makes it possible for all members of the family to live in that same atmosphere. He or she is the leaven, the salt, or the light. It does not mean that in the Day of Judgement, non-believing members of the family will have eternal life. It only means they are temporarily blessed with a place of God's protection.

Note: In conversation with a friend, I learned that I had ignored the Christians's prayers on behalf of the family. That's an additional pathway to grace and mercy for unbelieving spouse and children.

Extra source: Cornerstone Biblical Commentary 1 Corinthians (William Baker), 2 Corinthians (Ralph Martin & Carl Toney), ed. by Philip Comfort. Carol Stream: Tyndale House Publishers, c2006.

1 Corinthians 7:13

And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him (KJV)

Then: Paul continues to discuss mixed marriages. He follows the same pattern of this section. Concentrating on a specific aspect of his concern, he alternates between addressing the man and the woman, sometimes one first and sometimes the other (Baker, p. 98). The approach emphasizes his teaching of mutual submission. The Holy Spirit indwells all followers of the Lord never giving greater value to anyone. This accords with the teaching of Peter whose words are recorded in Acts 10:34-35, "Of a truth I perceive that God is no respecter of persons: but in every nation he that feareth him and worketh righteousness, is acceptable to him."

Now: Paul continually honors the hope of living a life of following Christ. He understands and promotes the belief that it is both easier and better to concern oneself with spreading the gospel to others rather than put the concerns of a spouse above ministry. Accordingly, his follow-on discussion of the effect on the whole family points to the spiritual, not the practical effects of family/societal disruption of single parent families.

Extra source: Cornerstone Biblical Commentary 1 Corinthians (William Baker), 2 Corinthians (Ralph Martin & Carl Toney), ed. by Philip Comfort. Carol Stream: Tyndale House Publishers, c2006.

1 Corinthians 7:12

But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away (KJV)

Then: Paul restates his belief that men should stay married - adding a twist in focus. He considers the non-believing status of the partner, yet determines the couple should remain married. Most likely this was a detail question which the Corinthians asked. Paul's answer differs from guidelines given to the Israelites of old. When they were led astray by the proliferation of idols and false gods of non-believing partners, the priests directed the people to put away the non-believers. Life changed with Christ whose death marked the way for all believers and not-yet believers to be forgiven. Perhaps that's why Paul says "speak I, not the Lord." Old Testament history lacks words from God on the subject.

Now: Believers who have the gift of the Lord's indwelling spirit know Paul is speaking towards the ultimate purpose that all should be saved and become followers of Christ. They also know their part in his service of going into all the world, teaching the gospel and baptizing many into the kingdom. It is through his spirit that they sometimes need to discern whether to follow Paul's advice or not. For Jesus also gave another principle of not casting pearls before swine. A woman married to an abusive husband - physically, mentally, or emotionally needs the spirit's guidance to know if her ultimate death would help bring the spouse into the kingdom or if the sacrifice of her life would be in vain. The same is true if the abused spouse is the husband. Listening carefully to the Holy Spirit provides answers that can only be known to the Lord.

1 Corinthians 7:10

And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband (KJV)

Then: Paul is always careful to match his advice with the Lord's commandments. Addressing the wife first, Paul clearly shows his knowledge of Jesus' teachings by attributing this statement about divorce to him (Baker, p. 102). If either the husband or the wife "puts away" the other, he or she commits adultery (Mark 10:11-12). Jesus does allow it in the instance of fornication (Matthew 5:32). Paul considered the law to be paramount whether one of both spouses were followers of Christ.

Now: Few individuals view marriage as God's plan for spiritual growth. Rather than practicing love and forgiveness in a specially designed laboratory, they prefer to abandon the situation. Often they plunge into another, similar situation which again reveals the need for spiritual growth.

Extra source: Cornerstone Biblical Commentary 1 Corinthians (William Baker), 2 Corinthians (Ralph Martin & Carl Toney), ed. by Philip Comfort. Carol Stream: Tyndale House Publishers, c2006.